Stick A Fork in It

I went to the golden trough for dinner. You’ve probably eaten there too, that well known place offering steak everyday or all the shrimp you can eat? Ever notice the size of people who come to a buffet? Of course, it could just be the small town I live in. People, especially the women, are large here. Statistically, on any given day, I could see the correct percentage of the obese population coming to graze. Perhaps not. After putting my fork down, I watched my husband stack up empty plates. I wonder if he ever thinks about why he can’t stop eating when he fully acknowledges he eats too much when we come here. A disconnect from what he knows to what he does, but not really.

Errol Morris writes about anosognosia, a condition in which a person who suffers from a disability, seems unaware of or denies the existence the disability. Not-knowing things that we should know — not knowing that we are not making any sense, not knowing that we are paralyzed, not knowing we are missing limbs. Or perhaps not knowing when we should put the fork down. Dunning and Kruger* argued in their paper, “When people are incompetent in the strategies they adopt to achieve success and satisfaction, they suffer a dual burden: Not only do they reach erroneous conclusions and make unfortunate choices, but their incompetence robs them of the ability to realize it.” Forrest Gump summed it up,

"Stupid is as stupid does.

*Justin Kruger and David Dunning, “Unskilled and Unaware of It: How Difficulties of Recognizing One’s Own Incompetence Lead to Inflated Self-assessments,” Journal of Personality and Social Psychology, 1999, vol. 77, no. 6, pp. 1121-1134.

Madame Butterfly

Parsley Is gharsely.--Ogden Nash 

I have a butterfly farm. Course it is at the sacrifice of my parsley. These are the caterpillar of the Black Swallowtail Butterfly. I had to purchase some parsley to supplement their diet. My poor plant was decimated and it was Jenny Craig for the caterpillars.

 

"The butterfly counts not months but moments, and has time enough.-- Rabindranath Tagore

Humor Raisin

 

 Humor. Just another tasty ingredient in Hermit Cookies.

Reflections

In Japan, dragonflies are symbols of courage, strength, and happiness, and they often appear in art and literature, especially haiku. In ancient mythology, Japan was known as Akitsushima, which means ‘Land of the Dragonfly’.

I wrote a haiku.

Captured forever
Dragonfly in amber,
Golden memory.

More dragonfly haiku at Natures Echo Haiku series. If you have an idea for a haiku, write me a comment.

Dragonfly In Amber

We are obsessed with time. We have appliances and gizmos to save time. We are encouraged to spend time wisely, time heals all wounds or wounds all heels, time is money, time flies, killing time until it kills you, life's like an hourglass, glued to the table. There are even those who have chronomania. The hurry up disease of attempting to burn the candle at both ends. Faster, faster, faster! Whatever we try to do, it’s all in the hopes of stopping time. Libera me, domine, de morte aeterna, deliver me, o Lord, from eternal death. Kurt Vonnegut wrote, ‘Here we are, trapped in the amber of the moment.’ Since eviction from the garden, man has sought immortality. My son has bestowed that on me. I am a dragonfly in amber.

Dragonflies are inhabitants of two realms - a watery birth then metamorphosis to an airy death. The eggs hatch in water and a nymph emerges to grow and develop. They are short and chunky with a crusty hump on their backs, Odonata mini-Quasimodo. This portion of the dragonfly life cycle can take up to four years to complete. The nymph will complete the metamorphosis into a dragonfly by crawling out of the water, shedding it’s skin and emerging as a young dragonfly. They maneuver incredibly sensitive iridescent wings in the slightest breeze. Dashing, darting, hovering and vibrating over the waters all the while hunting for food.

I admit his childhood was not easy as I worked out my own dysfunctional template, imprinting a new generation with faulty traditions. My son was a defiant and difficult child. I only knew one way to handle him. Fossilized in his memory, I am the angry woman married to an alcoholic on the cusp of divorce. Life isn't measured in minutes, but in moments, and he chose this one to preserve.

It saddens me, the looking back through amber colored glass, but I am not left without hope. Dragonflies are a symbol of the sense of self that comes with maturity. Alis volat propiis, She flies with her own wings. I have gained insight, become peaceful, and reconnected with my son. Dragonflies have about 30,000 facets to their compound eyes, giving them nearly a 360° field of vision. A circle. I honestly feel like I've come full circle and my heart is finally in the right place. Adult dragonflies live a short life, about two months, and it knows it must live to the fullest with what it has. This lesson is huge for each of us. We become our best when the life we have left is the shortest.