Who Says I'm Crabby?

We've all seen a cop drama TV show in which a criminal suspect is interrogated while police watch from behind a mirror. That mirror consists of a light side and a dark side with one side allowing bright light while the opposite side allows faint light through. People on the brightly lit side see their own reflection—it looks like a normal mirror. People on the dark side see through it—it looks like a transparent window. 

That’s the advantage of a dark side. Carl Jung taught we all have a face that looks back from the dark side of the glass. He called it the shadow. Those parts of our personality we’re not proud of, choose to deny, or hide away. My husband calls me Lucy Van Pelt. It is not a nickname bestowed with affection. Charles Shultz, the creator of Peanuts, said,

"Lucy comes from that part of me that’s capable of saying mean and sarcastic things, which is not a good trait to have, so Lucy gives me a good outlet.

Lucy was his shadow. Even though my spouse uses this nickname in ridicule, was there something I could learn? In Bringing Your Soul to Work: An Everyday Practice, it offers an exercise to find the hidden treasures in our shadow.

"One of the indirect ways we can approach our shadow is to examine someone we admire and why we admire them, whether real people or fictional characters. And sometimes what we learn can be surprising.

I do admire Lucy. She goes through life on her own terms. I want that life. I can use her bossiness to become my own life coach. Crabby? You betcha. She has a voice and speaks up, no one takes advantage of her. No way would she settle for being labeled. Being a fussbudget keeps me thinking about unfortunate things that might happen. As a master of disaster management, I am resilient, prepared, and fearless. Bad tempered and mean? Sure. I will fight in the name of respect, truth and fairness. Accepting my imperfections, weaknesses, and shortcomings helps me become more humble and genuine. I am a positive force. I am reminded that people who live behind glass mirrors should not throw stones of criticism at other people. Perhaps my spouse could learn something from Nelson Muntz? Haw haw.